"People who expect deference resent mere civility." Mason Cooley
I work under the idea that women are attracted to only the top portion of a given male population. I think that the percentage of that portion varies according to the individual woman; a super-model may only find 5% of given males acceptable, while a more average-looking woman may find 20% acceptable. The point is that women are much more selective in their mating preferences.
While it may be a woman's own business as to what she finds attractive, the problem is that she is NOT indifferent to those men she does not find accepteable. I believe many women simply expect deference from men that they don't find to be eligible mates. I think most of those "rejected" men would rather be ignored than obligated by a large portion of society to place women who detests them on pedestals. This is probably one of the many reasons men opt to go their own way. To me, this also explains why women do not often appreciate anything done for them. Women simply expect special treatment from men not on their mating radar. The problem is that most men don't want to waste resources on women who don't want them, men will often do exactly that however, if they are lead to believe that they are cared for.
To me, this explains some of the callous behavior of women in regards to cuckolding and the like. A woman is not concerned with a man's feelings even though they are married in part because she doesn't really view him as a separate person. To her, she and the "alphas" she is attracted to are human; the other men are subhuman.